So I haven't been drunk in a while. A long while. And now I am. Big time. I am sitting here slugging down whiskey (Jack Daniels, natch!) and trying to surf my emotions. It's been working all night. I was over at Jupiter running my routine of hard-core humor. I had the crowd laughing their asses off. I mean it. They were crying with laughter. It was basically a lesson on how to give a good blow job, but I didn't pull any punches.
That was great. I was great. I was loving how much fun and laughter the group was having. I laughed too. I was that funny. So funny I laughed at my own jokes. And I left and felt drained - like there was a feeding frenzy of me. Yeah, I chopped myself up to make the chum to feed the sharks. I wanted to. I have no excuse. I am there for that sort of thing. I exist to make people laugh. I'm the hanging man. And I don't mean that as an excuse.
I love it. If there is one thing I can do in this world, it's make people laugh. I see things and am not afraid to speak it as I see it - and life is funny. It's funny without embelishment. Someone questioned whether or not I was making things up and it was instantly clear that I wasn't because what I was saying was too fucking real for anyone to make it up. You could relate. You could see that what I was saying was parallel with your own experiences. The sounds of orgasm are familiar to everyone. Sure, they're different, but not really. You can hear the sounds of genuine primal gutteral grunts regardless of their origin - and they're funny. Gut-busting funny if produced correctly.
I produced. I managed to keep the laughs going for at least an hour. I know that the general consensus was that I should take my "act" on the road and just be a stand-up comedian. I think I could do that. If I wanted a life that was even more miserable than I already have, I would. I'd go on the comedy circuit and try to make people laugh for a living. Yeah. I don't think it's worth it. Selling yourself out for money is just not my thing. I feel pretty good about selling myself out for easy laughs, but the idea of turning a dollar on it just makes me even more miserable than I already am.
Posted by Matt at May 4, 2003 04:09 PM