She's looking at me, and he's there with her. We're staring and not and are again.
The staring goes on and on and cars pass and people pass and our eyes lock and not and again.
She says, "So, do we just stay here?" and I notice her purple overcoat, the sheen of it, the smell of her innocent perfume and her eyes and they're beautiful and hurt and painful.
"Do we just stay here?" I mimic. And I turn and I take a step. "Do we just stay here?" and I punch a stop sign and it makes a resonant tone like a monastary bell. "Do we just stay here?" and I grab the sign's pole and push and it creaks and folds over and I cannot breathe and it's "Do we just stay here?" in my hands curling the metal and folding the metal and crushing the metal and the metal is screaming and it's bending and I grab it from the base near its roots with both hands tightly and I plant my feet and and and I pull
"DO and I'm pulling it
WE and it strains
JUST and the sidewalk and my hands crack and pops
STAY and it breaks free, a concrete lollypop with a wicked twisted stick
HERE?!" and I'm just holding it, kneading the metal in my hands and frozen still in impotent rage and horror in my impotence at my helpless action and the metal screams and her eyes scream and his eyes mock and scream and "Do we just stay here?" and I wake up and my guts are liquid stone a seething magma and there are no tears but I'm filled with them hot and stagnant and immobile and it's just silent and dark and my heart is broken so I can't be hearing it but that is all there is.
"Do we just stay here?"
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This is a good time to mention that you have your -own- website, and you should probably write things like that on -it- and not -here-.
Even better? Write it in a secret journal, and then burn the journal.
Posted by: Matt at July 18, 2003 09:41 PMI had a dream with you in it, sccarey stuff. I dreamed that you were over my house and you took off your shirt because it was too hot. All I saw was Dorito cheese paste all over your body and I wanted to lick it off. Needless to say I woke up with a hard on and it scared me.
Posted by: d0g_p00p at July 18, 2003 09:34 PMI just had to write this down. It was such a powerful dream/nightmare that I had no choice at all. I got up and started to type even though my eyes were still closed.
I still remember it vividly even now.
Posted by: Matt at July 18, 2003 02:29 AMor do we just stay here? do we move forward? or do we try again? or do we pretend it never happened? or do we...
i don't know.
we hide.
we cry.
we pretend.
we move.
we stay.
we try.
hugs
Posted by: racheal at July 17, 2003 10:35 PM